We have limited control over the world and the circumstances we find ourselves in. The only thing we have full control over is how we perceive and engage with the world. You may not have full control over where you work or what you do at every point in your life, but you do have full control over what you feel and think about it.
You say that you current company is large and soulless, a cubicle farm, and that because of that you feel like you're in a prison, or hopeless. But that isn't the only way to look at it. Maybe you could try to elevate the culture, to do such good work that it inspires others, bring fresh new ideas to the table, be bold and stand out. You could say it has no meaning, but you could just as easily imbue it with meaning. You could elevate the role. It's a choice.
Let me give you some advice - you won't find meaning out here. Life is, at the end of the day, objectively meaningless. "A tale told by an idiot, full of sound and fury, signifying nothing." If we want meaning we have to create it, we have to imbue the world with it. You can choose to despair, or you can see that life's what you make it. If you are going to spend some time being a cubicle dweller in some large company, then spend that time being the best version of it possible. Take joy in finding meaning where others may not.
Read philosophy. Take up art. Play an instrument. Labor intensely on some project no one will ever see. Make great things and then let them go. Get a dog. Find meaning in cleaning up poop. Make candles. Bake. Be the kind eccentric. I hope you find peace.
This post was possible with excerpts from "The Myth of Sisyphus" by Camus.*
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